You are, You

You are a person of beauty;
don't you ever sell yourself.
You are a person of wit and ability;
don't you ever doubt.
You are a person of might;
don't you ever get weak and feeble.
You are a person who possess enough gifts;
don't misuse them, but use them to help others.

You have always impressed me;
and where and why the reason to doubt in yourself?
You have always been great;
why can't you just believe?
You have always been good;
why do you not see?
You have always been best, and all balanced out;
you're perfect in His eyes and mine.

Just Ordinary Love

As long as it's just ordinary love
As long as we don't learn
As long as we remain
Who we are, just the same

There won't be real love
And we miss a lot
We miss the chance to have
That life-long kind of love

Let's not let it hurt
Till we start to learn
Let's not be this dumb
Till we grow the same, just as numb

Let's love right
Let's learn from [t]His life
So that in the end
We know how it feels like

Let us not love
With [just] an Ordinary love

You won't find it in me
Nor in the way that you love me
It's no different than ordinary love
But His' is not the same

You won't find it this way
That you've done the same before
It's a different experience everyday
Like nothing ever dared compare

It's not just in the streets
Nor could you find it here
But It will find you there
Only have you wait

Take your time to learn
Your precious time to wait
You still have a lot in life to know
Let it teach you, let it grow

Till it find you there
After searching everywhere
To rest itself again
In a room you've left to spare

Prayer

Jesus, I don't know what to do
Nor know where I should go
For I am trapped alone
And I am cornered in this shore

I am responsible for this
And I'm to be blamed
I simply cannot boast
Of anything I did

I knew then but I still
Went on turning my ear
But now I am aware
I'm sorry I've [gone] astray

Save me, Jesus, here
From this mess I'm in
This mess I've done and
This mess that I can't clean

You have that flow alone
Of living well I need
To cleanse me, my whole soul
And quench my thirst and fear

Save me, Jesus, cos I can't
When I've sunk in this puzzle's wave
And have nothing left to say
But Jesus, Your name that saves

But You can wash it all away
You can make me new again
You've that power in Your name
When You died and rose again

I call out again
Hoping and not failing
To believe I am
Already answered as I pray

Pillows

In a dark cold night
Of tears and silence, dust
In a closed room of
Muted squeals of pain

Where no one else exists
Except a pillow, You
Where no one's there to hug
And no one's there for you

Tis' one friend left
One without a breath
But will carry you
The night of stars and blue

When you badly need that hug
But no one's there for you
There it would be
Still waiting, left for you

No matter how tight
Or you press on it so cruel
Would it never try react
It's just a simple tool

A pillow's a dear friend
There when you're in need
When you're all alone it is
By your side, will give you peace

To guide you in your sleep
And sponge up all your tears
Is just a deed it do
It's always there for you

Emergency

I needed to wake up for this series of blog entries. Hehe. I finished at 1:00 am exactly! Woah! At least I preserved the thoughts, and it helped relax my buzzy mind. :)

Read on. The one before this post, and the few succeeding (3) entries are the ones that I did (typing it right away from bed).

:)

I've slept so late again. :) But it's okay, it paid off :)

Back in Your Arms

I have now come back
To the original arms of love
Where You have found I
In a night filled with stars

I've fallen back again
And I will ever be
Till I return to where
I belong, where I don't fear (It's unto thee)

And I have realized
That I am always wrong
If I try to run away
Cos in Your arm's where I belong

I am glad that though
I've fallen this much low
It's in you I've land
And I am on safe ground

I've known this always
In Your arm's where I am safe
And I am much more sure
That It'll be my resting place

It will never really end
How bad I want to say
For I am in deep awe
In Your arm's where I belong

Knowing this one thing
That if I ever dream
In my nightmare you'd be there
And rescue me again

It's the safest arms that I
Have ever known and is
But, though I am afar
It's in You I'll still belong

Refined

As I reach you
And as I get near
I lose more and more of me
Til I've nothing left

You are a flame
And Your fire's ablaze
And if I'd get near
I've no choice but burn

Burn me, burn it all away
Form me, til I am as glass
And radiate Your light through me
By Your fire I am refined

You have burned all
Leaving no trace of me
You have consumed me
Til I've nothing left

I was covered with thorns
And it concealed the stone
I'd either escape the burn
But I'd rather turn to gold

Broken Lines

I am all messed up
With these broken lines
I am thorned and
My insides do hurt

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Endless confusion appears
Brought by these broken lines
And I do not have the solution
For they point out to destruction

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Will you not stop this
Mess and turn it into bliss
Will you not choose real joy
Than to hide behind these toys?

- - - - - - - - - - - -

I'm fed up and tired
Of everyday believing
The lies that you drew
From beginning when you knew me

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Heaven is waiting
I am too, for so long
To revive from this mess
That you've brought from the start

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Re-draw these broken lines
Make a new one
This time, point it up
Do it right this time

- - - - - - - - - - - -

I wanna wake up again
Cos this seems all like a dream
Let's make a start again
This time without any lines

Losing You

I'd prefer to lose
The game than to choose
Something worse like to lose
Someone like you

It'd feel like thorns in my heart
And a big rock on my back
To feel something like this
If I'm losing you

I would never want to lose you
Nor ever say goodbye
But if I ever do
I'd be thankful I found you

I'm not willing to lose you
Nor try to loose grip
But if they'll ever take you
My heart please, bring with you

I won't lose you
Cos you'll take me with you
That wherever you'll go
I'd be there ever with you

Empty Me

You looked inside my heart
And You see a lot of crowd
You want a place inside but
This place is filled with cloud

This room is all messed up
Want to pick up all the trash
I want to fix it all up
But I [just] don't know where to start

I want to let You in
But there's no more room that's left
I will dispose my trash
Cos I want you here inside

I didn't want Your help
Cos I thought I'd do it all
But You told different
And You took me in Your hold

I have lost control
It only gets worse
Empty me today
And fill me like a purse

So that I could follow You
And bear what You bore
Knowing this one Truth
That You did it all before

Fool from the Stars

You belong to the sky
You are a bright shining star
You may bring beauty in the night
But you are fallen from above

You speak beauty
You show love
You display wisdom
But only just in form

You fly up the sky
Reaching such great heights
You showcase yourself to all
But you crash down the base

You are a fool from the stars
You look good in your mistakes
You look all that beautiful
But your feet are of the dust

You have tried thousand times
And you have failed all the more
All these just points to one truth
That you shouldn't try anymore

You have forgotten the faith
You were a fool from the stars
But you remembered
You trust Him once again

You're still beautiful
You look good in His eyes
And you belong to Him
You little fool from the stars

Bright Morning Star

When I wake up and see that light
That bright morning Star
I recieve the joy
And that hope that I'm looking for

When I wake another day
And breathe in air
I feel I am healed
All my scars are gone

I rise again from deep slumber
And gleeming rays blinds my sight
It enters deep making me remember
How you have healed me by Your light

Everything's new I can strongly say
Giving me strength throughout the day
And when I feel weak Your hands You stretch
Once again I am saved

Fix Me

I thought I could get over you
But I'm still crying
Looking back over the times
That we were in the best terms ever

It can't stop till I get the answers
To the questions I ask all day long
And the reason why
All of this is happening

But yet I believe
It won't end that way
Or at least it's not the last of it
And that things would get fixed anyway

Fix me, please help me
I pray may You give me more strength
And when I can't do it anymore
Please take over

Cos I know and I believe
That it won't end that way
In you I'll have my last breath
And You'll carry me onto tomorrow

Let me see the sunshine again
Bright on my face
That light rejuvinating my inside
And has given my soul new life

This is goodbye
And hi at the same time

Unknown

I'm in the unknown
In the lost for words
I'm in need of expression
A dose of release
So that I could speak of my confession
And add up to my relief

This is just just a fling
Maybe, with reality
And all the seconds passing by me
So that for a while the moment I could catch
The memories so beautiful
Like a firefly in a jar

I don't know what to say
The Truth has saved my day
And I don't know if I fear
Or my smile might just be queer
I am thankful but sorry
May I make this last for eternity

In the end what I would do
Speak from my heart, and pray unto You
For everything You are
For capturing my heart
For astounding me with Your eternal beauty
And ever, for making me happy

I end this in Peace
And of all Your love
This is not the end though
But another start
And oh, a beautiful one
So I thank You all the more

It is a new day again
An end for another day
My table of mistakes now
Have all been turned down-up
Because Your eyes are ever there
Ever there upon me

JOYRIDE: On the Way Home

it was 7PM, my dismissal time. it was raining, but not as hard as it did when we still were having our communication class. i did not have an umbrella or a jacket with me, which i usually brought. i ran across the street from the school, and i saw the place where i go to ride a van home empty. i decided to go to SM Pala-Pala so i took a jeepney. there's another FX terminal in there but it's farther from school and i'd have to add a little amount of money for the total budget for transpo for today. i arrived at the terminal and waited, watching news in a small TV. i appreciated the news. at last, after several minutes, the FX was ready to go. i was happily seated, and even exchanged seats with a lady because i get dropped on the way earlier.

the van started moving and we were on our way. vans usually use a shortcut route, so there we are, taking up the shortcut. unfortunately, the shortcut wasn't much of a shortcut after all. a big bus, a big truck, and two others were blocking the narrow road of that shortcut. gosh, i can't believe they'd stop in the middle of the road. we passed through the first blockage using the counterflow. after that, another block. we thought it was just an ordinary wait. we clearly see in front of us a big bus exactly were the narrowest part of the road is. we didn't realize til soon that the traffic wasn't moving at all. even cars taking the counterflow couldn't get through.

well, it wasn't the end. manong driver thought of a great thing to do. he was decisive and i liked him for thinking quickly. he turned around to go back. he decided to take the normal route, just parallel the shortcut. they don't usually take that road because you have to wait a few minutes for ur turn in the island. yes, we came back to that same island and waited a few minutes.

all of a sudden, manong driver made another 'quick' decision. he sure is decisive :p. instead of turning right to the normal route, he drove forward. gosh! i thought he was about to takae alabang route! we might be going to manila! it's way farther. there was another route, but it would only lead to the first route that i think he tried to avoid.

what's going on? i was thinking. well, i calmed myself down, thinking that he knows what he's doing.

there it was, again! i was proven wrong. he did another 'quick' decision. he turned right to a stranger route that none of the passengers even know about! we were all scared. we might get lost! i just tried to think that he, again, knows what he's doing. he followed the track, made several turns and turns. in front of us was a car. inside my mind, i felt that he was just following that car. but i doubted. i was wronged, i shouldn't have doubted! the car that he was following stopped, so he got nervous. he made a ridiculous turn to nowhere. we were lost. mister manong driver still wasn't talking until the 2nd time the guy beside him asked him where we were going. he made a pretentious statement saying, 'i think this is not it!' i felt a lot of times that we were on a dead end, and there we are!

manong driver asked a few residents directions. he was planning to take the route in our school. i was going back to school right after i left it! wow, they really want me in school! we got saved by a good fellowman, a resident who helped us twice.

manong driver was really lost. he didn't even know the major highway that we were in when we got out of that subdivision-maze. he shouldn't have asked me where we were, cos we were near school that time. he continued driving and arrived at the same old route that he tried to avoid. there we are, no traffic at all, no jams.

it was already 8:15PM and i haven't arrived home yet. it was still a 45min travel. we wasted about 30minutes finding a better (ehemm, longer) route.

anyway, it didn't bother me that much. i was happy this day. my favorite class just ended and i liked the rain. it was peaceful. another thing that added to my joy was the radio program that made me laugh a lot. even the manong behind me laughed at the radio program. :p i enjoyed listening to the radio and it stopped me from complaining. i laughed instead, and reflected a lot while inside the van.

this was a nice experience for me, a joyride! haha, i won't forget it! :P

who you are

i just ask and pray
that may you be who you really are
a man of wealth, a man of hope
a man unwaivering in faith
a man that would never go astray
and would fight all the way

so that at the end of the line
you would know and see clearly
who you really are
a man filled with ecstacy
filled with all skill and ability
and would never again doubt in yourself

so that i, too would never doubt
cos even if i see i choose to fight
the things that push me
i'd share the fight, i'd be a true friend
so that you'd know that i, too, believe
in the same faith and hope that is in your heart

await the feeling of heaven
until it is fully revealed
and it is no longer imagination
and it is reality, in ur heart has filled
and you see a thing in this world no more
and your faith is fully grown

once again i call out
be the man that you really are
and may you never doubt
and i, too, would never doubt
with nothing in return
just for you to be who you really are

knowing ain't enough

knowing ain't enough. it is only a step to renewal, just a step to change. in other situations, knowing only hurts and only burdens.

there are a lot of things going on inside my head. there are a lot of things in life that i learn and have learned. they're very helpful and reflect the truth, but still nothing [or a lot does not] happen[s]. it just implies that knowing isn't enough.

life is very complicated, too complex for instant change. even God teaches the value of time in his ways. knowing isn't an assurance of instantaneous change, and if not, change itself.

we shouldn't overlook the more important things, the goodier things. we don't really see a lot of times which things are for us, which things that are best for us instead of what we want.

it is the end of the day, this is what i have come to reflect with.

Assets and Liabilities~~

I've learned a lot about financial education. I have realized what Assets and Liabilities are. I have moved out from the thought that they're just boring subjects in accounting. Now I know how IMPORTANT they are.

I began reading this book entitled "Rich Dad, Poor Dad", written by Robert Kiyosaki, a rich Entrepreneur, Investor and Educator. He really have given a big amount of knowledge input to my mind.

With what I've learned about assets and liabilities, I saw it's relation in real life, not just the business and financial world. It's just the same as valuing people, and valuing what's inside rather than the outside beauty of a matter. Also, valuing the more important but seemingly 'boring' things in life, rather than the 'passing pleasures' in this world.

I have also learned a lot with decision-making, related with speculating a matter if it is a good choice or not. Though, in our Christian life, speculation is not always the appropriate practice because even if something doesn't seem too good, or seems hopeless, God does a big miracle, like He always does.

It has a big scope in our lives, everything seems connected in life, like how I saw a connection with this one.

I'll write a review about the book "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" after this, and the game "CASHFLOW".

:o)

Kuya Eric's game...

It's kuya eric's game na makipagpadamihan ng replies dito sa Multiply, like it's Paul's sa friendster. hmmm, tignan nga naten kung magcclick tong post na to sa Market, err, ehem, or Multiply, at kung matatalo kaya ang record ni kuya (na sa palagay ko eh not that much of a record din naman, hehe) na 70+ replies by people who would reply in here. hehe. wala lang. (ang palagay ko lang e ndi din papatok to hahaha, pero why not try diba? it's a risk that nothing's at stake naman eh. good business pare. businessmen tayo ngayon)

Human Ways

I'm an individual. Speaks for itself, cos I am alone. How humanly. I ask myself why human ways are so easily wronged? They create laws so fallible, you'd hate them. You probably know what happened to me so that I could say these things. NO, you're wrong, they're not the entire reason. The entire reason is LIFE. Life's no joke. I teach myself to learn the way how things in our ever-changing, difficult and complicated world work. Kids laugh their bellies about it's issues that they hate to know. They refuse knowledge. I thought they were supposed to learn? That they have 'young' and 'teachable' hearts? You might say that the world is turning upside-down. Human systems are reversing, working the opposite that they should. When you become older, you know and know more, and there you learn, it seems. That's not bad, though. The only backfall of that matter is when you learn after all the misses, after all the strength wasted where you should've used it for the things it was meant to be used for, to help others and more things in this world that you should know. It kinda hurts, living in this world when you don't see joy, when you're just normal and ordinary, living with ordinary men and women. That just tells, you gotta be different. It is a call. More than different, you gotta be correct... See what I'm saying?

*Laughs!* Hahahaha! This is really dumb! :p lol