Pillows

In a dark cold night
Of tears and silence, dust
In a closed room of
Muted squeals of pain

Where no one else exists
Except a pillow, You
Where no one's there to hug
And no one's there for you

Tis' one friend left
One without a breath
But will carry you
The night of stars and blue

When you badly need that hug
But no one's there for you
There it would be
Still waiting, left for you

No matter how tight
Or you press on it so cruel
Would it never try react
It's just a simple tool

A pillow's a dear friend
There when you're in need
When you're all alone it is
By your side, will give you peace

To guide you in your sleep
And sponge up all your tears
Is just a deed it do
It's always there for you

Fix Me

I thought I could get over you
But I'm still crying
Looking back over the times
That we were in the best terms ever

It can't stop till I get the answers
To the questions I ask all day long
And the reason why
All of this is happening

But yet I believe
It won't end that way
Or at least it's not the last of it
And that things would get fixed anyway

Fix me, please help me
I pray may You give me more strength
And when I can't do it anymore
Please take over

Cos I know and I believe
That it won't end that way
In you I'll have my last breath
And You'll carry me onto tomorrow

Let me see the sunshine again
Bright on my face
That light rejuvinating my inside
And has given my soul new life

This is goodbye
And hi at the same time

Hurt

I'm hurt and I can't move
This ache I could not remove
This feeling in my chest
It's piercing my heart endlessly
Without blood but I'm dying slowly

It makes me weak if I think
Of what you've done to me
It makes my heart beat fast
I couldn't catch my breath
Even if I breathe carefully

I'm probably losing conrol of my sanity
Who's even there to catch me in my misery
Right now I just want to catch a deep breath
That it would feel okay
And even for a second forget all the pain

The memories, they get harder
Cemented on the walls of your brain
They won't break and soon
They'd just turn into gold
Like fear you have in a nightmare

Find me somebody who could save me
Find me somebody who could cover me with love
Bind the wounds of may shattered heart
Put it all together and make me new
Give me a new name so that I wont remember

This is a hard choice
All just points into losing
I hide back to the deep of not knowing
But I ask who's that bright light
Staying with me even when I was in the dark

Silenced

I am silenced, I've got nothing left to say
What you did hovered me, surrounded me over and over
Made me feel dizzy and useless inside
I've got no hope left, no reason to live either
Why's this happening? I ask my self every moment I breathe in air

I'm waiting for an answer to my hopes, that this is just a test
A dream maybe, waiting for me to wake up
Or maybe just a joke, that you wanted me to laugh on
But it seems so real, I feel it inside my skin
It hurts like nothing I've ever felt, an incomparable feeling

I still wait, inside me there's someone talking
Telling me the reasons why you went away
Tells me it's my fault that I wasn't strong enough
I enjoyed too much, when it was you I should've given joy
It feels so unreasonable, yet foolish. I am a fool

I pray at night, at the dark
Hoping for a miracle to bring you back
Or maybe I didn't pray well enough
Tells a lot why you're still not here with me
Maybe I should keep silent, think things over

You were right, there was something wrong
You've got all the reasons not to be strong
I deserve what you did, you've done what was right
I want to learn, stop being a fool
To think I was the one who tell you not to be

I should've looked in the mirror to see clearly
And so to understand more deeply
If it is also possible to roll back the words I've let in the air
Act like you didn't hear a thing, so much like an err
But you reply, you said it scarred, you said it's no lie

I am scared yet I shouldn't be
This is not how I'm supposed to be
I'll just pretend again, or I'll just forget
Maybe then, you'll do too
And things will be the way they were...

Stop now, I will go

The words come out
From the tears, they speak for me
The meanings come from the blood
That I shed in my heart, inside me

I see only black and white
I am living inside history
This is just a dream
But this is reality to me

You haven't seen because
You didn't open them eyes yet
You didn't want to see either
Cause you already knew the truth

You were the one who did this
How could you not know?
But I ask this question more
How could you endure?

I have the answers in my pocket
I know that you're afraid
I've told you a thousand times
The same thing over and over again

It hasn't remedied anything yet
Nothing, not a gain
You're still searching for solutions
To the questions that you've scribbled

I know what to do now
I'll go there where you are
To the place that you avoid
Where you fear to tread upon

Not alone but with you I will
I will go before you, You will see me
I will take all the harm in the way
Just to make your fears go away...