MAD

It's not the T.V. show. It's not the acronym for the local anti-drugs movement. It's not a brainer either. It's just what I feel. I am mad at something, and the only thing nearest to me that I can point fingers to is myself. Yes, I am angry; I hate and am mad at myself. Why? Let's see...

I am confounded; there's something in me that wants to blame somebody for something wrong, or at least, I feel something ain't right. I don't really know what's happening. Something's just not right, like I said. It's not always like this (life is much better, I know). It's just that right now, I feel a mixture of fear, dissapointment, and regret.

I am to be blamed for what I've done wrong, yet I always fear to receive the equal return of what I do wrong. Life shouldn't work that way. I know that life isn't that bad as we think it is.

I want a new perspective in living and breathing my days. As I breathe these words, as I release them, may I be emptied out. May it be the end; at least for now it is. If (or whenever) it comes back again, lemme look back at it with a cheerful smile because I know that I will have been there before.

Oh, you might want to ask why I felt mad anyway. I told you earlier, "let's see". I guess, as you went with me through reading this, you saw it already. Don't worry. That's all there is.

(Exhales).